Protecting Women ?

Here’s my comment on a female erotica writer’s blog. The blogger’s post in question is  called ” Unpacking The Baggage of History: Sex Work and the Myth of Protecting Women”

Me:

But isn’t the idea of a “happy hooker” not a myth as well? Prostitutes who don’t want to exit are in the minority.Also, *my* kind of feminism does not feel any sort of paternalism over prostitued people, and other kinds fully support legalization. I, however, do not. I’ve heard too many tesitmonies (straight from sex worker’s mouths) and read too many studies about how dangerous an industry it can be.But I didn’t come here to cause anything. Just my opinion.

Here is some of her post:

The phrase ‘sex trafficking’ is being used to encompass all sex work – including sex work by consenting adults with agency. It masks a very disturbing form of ‘gaslighting’ which argues that no ‘sane’ woman would agree to sex work. So all adult women who consentingly perform sex work are too brainwashed and victimized to know what they are consenting to. They have been, in fact, culturally relegated to the position of women who require the state to make decisions on their behalf because they can’t possible be freely making this decision on their own. This is as offensive and repressive as the laws and attitudes of the past in which women were thought intellectually incapable of voting or having say over their own reproductive functions.

Firstly, radfems know that feminists as a whole do not agree when it comes to sex work. Liberal feminists support sex work and find it empowering. This erotica writer, pseudonym initials RG, has lumped all feminists together when really I think she’s pointing at us. Radical feminists.

In my opinion, my comment is pretty watered down compared to the book one could write about this (and has already been written multiple times).

Now, I will mention that RG’e erotica is portrays rape, beastiality, torture, and bdsm aspects. Her approach is that she does not reach for arousal in readers, but contemplative thought. Many of her female characters crave piv and experience immemse pleasure from it (sometimes addictive), of which made it difficult for me to relate with them. I’ve read some of her books. Her writing is superb, but the subjects questionable.

But anyways, I would never want to insult any woman and say that she isn’t ‘sane’ for working in the sex industry. A lot of sex workers know. They know, okay? Ignoring their voices seems to be what sex-pozzies love to do.

The happy members of an oppressed population doesn’t make that population any less oppressed.

What others don’t understand is that radfems come from all walks of like, some having actually been a part of the sex industry. And the last thing I would do is ignore what they have to say.

Oh and, yes, I will admit. I would like to protect a fellow female if I could. What’s so wrong with that?

EDIT

Her reply to me earlier comment:

The myth of a happy hooker is about as much a myth as the happy factory worker or the happy floor cleaner. Would these people rather have better paying, more respected jobs? Yup.
Sex workers who don’t want to be sex workers should stop being sex workers. Period. And legalizing the industry will make it more likely that someone who feels coerced to do the job has some legal remedy. As an illegal industry, sex workers have no legal remedy at all.How does keeping an industry illegal make it safer? Certainly making it illegal doesn’t stop it. Sex work has been going on since the dawn of time, and it has usually been taboo or illegal within a society. How does maintaining that status quo make it safer?

She assumes that leaving the sex industry is easy.

Um, what?

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No.

When you say that the want for an end to sex work hurts the choices of all those consenually involved, you are ignoring every woman’s (and sometimes man’s) testimonies of how harmful said ‘work’ is. Sex ‘work’ ruins people (read: women are people too), no matter how much you like to focus on the positives.

-_-    Just no.

PS: Does the idea of purchasing someone’s body parts for personal (and risky/dangerous) use not around totally disturbing? Seriously. Those consenual, happy, empowered, speshuuul people don’t make up for all that’s wrong with the mass sexual exploitation going on worldwide.

Like seriously. No.

Againstpornography.org: Women’s Testimonies

My heart breaks and my stomach churns. 

Women’s Testimonies 

“I am speaking for a group of women. We all live in Minneapolis and we all are former prostitutes. All of us feel very strongly about the relationship between pornography and prostitution. Many of us wanted to testify at this hearing but are unable because of the consequences of being identified as a former whore. This is absolutely incredible to me that prostitution is seen as a victimless activity… We have started to meet together to make sense of the abuse we have experienced in prostitution and how pornography endorses and legitimizes that abuse. These are some of our stories. The following has all happened to real women who are the exception because they have survived both pornography and prostitution… One of the very first commonalities we discovered as a group: we were all introduced to prostitution through pornography. There were no exceptions in our group, and we were all under eighteen… Pornography was our textbook. We learned the tricks of the trade by men exposing us to pornography and us trying to mimic what we saw… Before I go on — one might make the assumption that if a woman got involved with pornography and prostitution after she was eighteen, that she is a willing participant. And since the women I speak for were all underage when they began, it is easier to see them as victims. Personally, I feel this to be very dangerous. By talking to women who got involved with prostitution and pornography in their early twenties, the powerlessness and victimization they described and experienced is the same that younger women and children feel… One of us had the experience of being paid by a client to go to a house located in the 6th Ward. When she got there, she found a group of physically disabled men and a group of physically abled men. Everyone was watching pornographic films — movies of men fucking women, women doing oral sex on men, and women being penetrated by animals. The movies were played continuously… [T]he able-bodied men said they were going to show the handicapped men how “real men” do it. They forced the woman to enact simultaneously with the movie… Another story is, a woman met a man in a hotel room in the 5th Ward. When she got there she was tied up while sitting on a chair nude. She was gagged and left alone in the dark for what she believed to be an hour. The man returned with two other men. They burned her with cigarettes and attached nipple clips to her breasts. They had many S and M magazines with them and showed her many pictures of women appearing to consent, enjoy, and encourage this abuse. She was held for twelve hours, continously raped and beaten… Men would constantly want to do what they have seen in pornography. If pornography was not actually in the room with the client, there would be constant reference. One example is that a woman was in a room with two clients, one man told the other that he had seen some pictures of women who had shaved their pubic hair and that it had turned him on. They then proceeded with a jackknife to remove the woman’s pubic hairs, plucking and burning what the knife had missed. They made comments of how her hairless vagina reminded them of their young daughters’ genitals. They then, of course, engaged in intercourse… Women were forced constantly to enact specific scenes that men had witnessed in pornography. They would direct women to copy postures and poses of things they had seen in magazines and then they would take their own pictures of the women… It is very amazing to me what happens when a group of ex-prostitutes get together in one room and tell stories. One of the things we discovered was that the men we had serviced were very powerful men in this community. Especially interesting to us are the amounts of men involved in the media in this community that use prostitutes and pornography. These are the same men that perpetuate the myth that Minneapolis is a clean city with exceptional morals and a high quality of life… My wish is that you could see with my eyes just for a day how clear the relationship is between pornography and the systematic abuse of women… I would also like to say that I’m petrified and scared for young women today. I believe the pornography that is published today is more brutal and dangerous than when I was involved. And because I understand clearly the direct relationship between the material and the abuse of women, I am very terrified of the consequences of what that means… I also have a couple written testimonies of women who were not able to speak tonight for the reasons I already gave. [Reading first written testimony]: “I remember a house on Second Avenue South, near 22nd Street which I was asked to go to by a trick… It turned out to be the same house that my pimp had been urging me to go to where he told me young pretty girls could go and get tied up, beaten and burned with cigarettes, and earn $500 for a short half hour’s work. I had steadily refused to go, but when my pimp found out that I had been invited, so to speak, I had to go there… The woman who ran the place actually lived there with her children. She kept a room upstairs for the tricks to use. It had a projector to show porn films and there was stacks of pornographic material in the room. The tricks would go in there, look at the porn to get psyched up and then the girl would be sent into the room. The youngest girl I know about who went there was only 13… When I went into that room, the trick said that I was almost too old, but he was pleased with me because I looked young. He stripped me, tied me up, spread-eagled, on the bed so that I could not move and then began to caress me very gently. Then, when he thought that I was relaxed, he squeezed my nipple really hard. I did not react. He held up a porn magazine with a picture of a beaten woman and said, “I want you to look like that. I want you to hurt.” He then began beating me, and when I didn’t cry fast enough, he lit a cigarette and held it right above my breast for a long time before he burned me. I told him that as God was my witness, he had better kill me or untie me right now, because if he didn’t, I would turn him in to the police and that I would call his wife and tell his family about him. He believed me and let me go. But I know that this house continued to provide that service for those who could pay…” [Reading second written testimony]: “I was the main woman of a pimp who filmed sexual acts almost every night in our home. The dope man, who supplied us with cocaine for free in exchange for these arranged orgies, was a really freaky man who would do anything. They arranged to have women, who I assumed were forced to be there, have sex with dogs and filmed those acts. There were stacks of films all over the house, which my pimp used to blackmail people with… One morning I came downstairs in time to see a very young girl run naked out of the house. I found her friend, also naked, tied up in the closet. The one who ran away, after being forced to perform sexually all night, went to the police. I don’t know what my pimp did with the other girl. I do know that he kidnapped them and felt safe, because they were foreign and alone. The girl came back with the police, but nothing ever happened. My pimp continued to make films of people doing every kind of sex act in the living room of our home…” 

We (women) are not making this up. You can’t make this stuff up. 

 

Proof: So you know it’s true

Check this out.

Women telling the truth.

The truth you ask?

Penis in vagina sex is basically unecssary to female pleasure (sex with women in general). Some quotes below:

YES. I make all the noises and do all the moving, but…honestly, it kind of hurts at first. And then it feels okay and then nothing else happens on my end. So then I am frustrated and I debate trying to find my vibrator while my boyfriend is in the bathroom but I spend so long debating that he comes out and I have to pretend to just be idly lolling around in a haze of post-coital bliss rather than figuring out how to ask if he’s sure he’s doing sex right.So yeah, glad I am not the only one
🙂

I like sex plenty, but I’m in the same boat. Need something other than p in v. And I loved this quote: “Men don’t have to have a fucking spiritual awakening to get off, so why should I have to meditate my way into an orgasm?” [As in, fuck psychological fweelings a woman may get during vaginal intercourse. See trauma-bonding]. SERIOUSLY. Why can’t I just bang my husband and orgasm without having to do twenty other things or get in a mystical mindset? I just want to freaking cum. Evolution is a bitch for making it so difficult.

I think a lot of the angry responses are from dudes who don’t want to be told that the only thing they have to offer to the world doesn’t actually do much. [Written by a male]

I think it goes deeper than that. I think it would stress anyone out to think that they are sexually inadequate in such a basic way that is so beyond their control. Like, no matter what you do, something that brings you great pleasure and intimacy is just kind of a nothing burger for the other person at best. AT BEST. Once the idea has been introduced into your mind you start to question whether your partner just does it to humor you and get it done with or if they actually enjoy it and if they don’t enjoy it why put them through this (I had this kind of existential sexual dilemma when I was 19 with my first serious GF who just didnt want to have sex after the first few months and it was shockingly an STD related issue)some of the responses are angry ego centric driven responses, But I can see this really bumming out otherwise loving and caring guys that this specific sex act just is just kind of a one sided and selfish like a BJ. [Written by a male]

I like the idea of PIV sex rather than the actual act itself. Every time I end up having it my mind wanders around like ‘what am I having for dinner?’ or something like that and my vagina always ends up super disappointed (‘oh? you’re finished…oh yeah i totally came yep totally, good job’).

Bold mine. Bold and italics are my comments.

Now there were a lot of comments of women declaring how much they love how piv feels, whether they orgasm from it or not. Of course, piv as a mandatory sexual act goes far beyond pleasure. The risks are far too high to even get pleasure from it. It has been a method amongst many to keep females inferior and as the ones who get ‘fucked’. And it has served to prove the masochistic and subordinate tendencies in females, because men know that if a woman actually wants to be fucked by a man, in this way, then obviously she is naturally a masochist.

Piv should not be on the menu unless conception is the actual goal. Which makes sense, right? One would think it would. And even for conception, a penis doesn’t have to enter the vagina, just sperm.

Again, the intimacy females feel during piv is trauma-bonding, as other radfems have already said before. Piv can get us pregnant, cause disease/std (easiesy way to catch one btw), and has been systematically used to oppress us via rape, prostitution, marriage (and now pornography). Females are groomed to see any male attention as some sort of gift, no matter how cold or disant or violent that attention is at times. If a man wants to ‘join his body with yours’ then he must luv you and care about you. You’re being intimate and bonding and making love. And if it’s just ‘casual’ piv, then she will still be deemed a whore even though males demand such sexual acts.

Is it possible that males are only supposed to have sex with females when reproduction is the sole purpose? Their bodies/genitalia only serve the purpose of ejaculating regardless of how muscely they are or how well they can hunt or fix a car or something. Funny how much lesbian and gay sex makes sense. A woman can be stimulated in every way she needs to feel recreational pleasure with another woman, as can a man with another man. Am I saying that everyone should be homosexual? No, not really.

But look at other primate species (humans are very similar to them by the way). The males and females mate typically once a year and then the males go off on their own and the females and children do their own thing alone. With the way that human females are only fertile for a little bit of time out of each month, it makes sense that piv is not supposed to be practiced at the rate it is in this patriarchal world. If it wasn’t, abortion would not be needed, nor would the pill, the iud, diaphragm,etc. Of course, females need these because of how much men and boys rape us, and still probably would as long as males are like this. And who knows if males are wired to do such violence within their biological makeup? They could very well be. That y-chromosome is a tricky one, but oh so predictable.

Anyways, the point of all this is to just give my own little analysis of piv. Running across that article above got me thinking.

Comments are much appreciated. (If you can be decent and not-rude about it.)

Yet another post y’all

I’m on a roll right?

But anyways. If you are a male, GET THE FUCK OUT! UNFOLLOW ME NOW BEFORE I HURT YOUR DUDELY FEELINGS!

I have no idea why these males (all white) are following blog.

I am an atheist African-American female FAAB (with some Native American in me) who is a radical feminist.

We DO NOT see eye-to-eye and history gives me all kinds of rights to advise you to gtfo of my blog.

Like seriously, this is utterly depressing. Majority of my followers are male now. Wtf? This is not what I had planned. Far from it.

So click that unfollow button and leave me and my words alone, you super priveledged men!

Fucking trolls. . .