Men Think That They’re Stars

image

The greatest thing a female can ever have is a man. Or so we’re told.

They tend to have the mindset that bestowing their attention upon a woman is like gifting her with life validation. My life must be incomplete, because I do not have any direct male attention. Boyfriend. Nope. Guy friend. Nope. Father. Not anymore.

My father has slandered my mother’s name to whomever he could get to listen. He claims that “the kids want their parents back together”, but my brother and I have had the most peace since he’s been out of the picture.    We don’t have to listen to someone threaten our mom’s well being and livelihood anymore.

Sadly, he stills thinks he’s done no wrong and that his apologies can make up for the last nineteen to twenty years. He’s a star, and he therefore makes my mother’s life worth meaning. It’s a male reversal, to say that she needs him. The truth is that he needs her so that he can leach off of her money and gynenergy. But those days are over, thank goodness.

No matter what a man does to a woman, he tends to walk away still feeling like she owes him. Buy you dinner? You owe me. Sell me your body? You owe me. Become pregnant by me? You owe me. Be physically harmed by me? You owe me. Get called a slut by me? You owe me.

They’re the A-listers on this red carpet. Women and girls are supposedly the accesories, backup dancers, extras, agents, assistants, cooks, baby sitters, sex slaves, and groupies. However, we will never be the directors, producers, etc. If that all makes sense.

They project their priviledges onto us, making it seem like buying dinner or a ring gives women the upper hand. They say that they do these things to earn that glorious moment when their woman spreads leg. But in reality, all roads of dealing with men lead to his penis. It’s all about his erection in the dating situations, the violent situtations, the times when you’re nothing more than a fetish. His satisfaction is the end-all-be-all of “romancing” and heterosexuality in general.

And for every ‘superficial woman’, ‘gold-digger’, ‘whore’, and ‘prude’, there are ten men pointing their fingers at her to deflect away from themselves. See?! Women are bad too. The shit they’ve done has nothing to do with patriarchal socialization created by men! We’re not so bad after all! They’re just as bad as us!

Not only are they special snowflakes–who are nothing like those other  men who rape, kill, degrade, imitate (but never duplicate), and impregnate–, they are stars. Superstars, shining bright in all their gold-star glory becaus they were nice to every woman they came across today. Sure, he might have ogled one of their asses and gone home to have a sexxay night with some porn, but he’s a good guy.

He respects the ladies. Treats them like queens. He’s got a wife and kids, as if that means something. He’s got a mother, a sister, an aunt, and a cousin. As if that means something. In the summer of 1995, he bought his pregnant girlfriend a BMW just weeks before their daughter was born! After years of assholery and abuse, the woman still owes him. Because he’s oh so special, erection and all.

He’s a star!  ★★★☆☆☆★★★

Oh and,
If I sound bitter, then #sorrynotsorry.

“Star No Star”

By Jack off Jill

I cannot distance myself
You were the one who believed
that only half of a girl
half more than you could deceive

I watch your face on TV
All that I am turns to fear
When you’re the boy that I want
I will be waiting right here

I don’t know what to believe
Sew up the sore make it fake
When you’re the boy that I want
I’ll be the girl that you hate

You end up dead in the end
Star no star
You end up right here my friend
Star no star
We end up dead in the end
Star no star
We end up right here my friend
Star no star

I can not distance myself
You were the one who believed
that only half of a girl
half you but never half me

I see your face on the street
Burnt hands but features so clear
When I’m the girl that you want
I will be waiting right here

I don’t know what to believe
peel all the scars from our way
When you’re the boy that I want
we will have one perfect day

You end up dead in the end
Star no Star
You end up right here my friend
Star no Star
We end up dead in the end
Star no Star
We end up right here my friend
Star no Star

I am so distant myself
I guess I never believed
that you could take it away
and I’d have no time to grieve

I don’t believe in TV
I don’t believe in the fear
When you are searching for stars
You will be looking right here

You end up dead in the end
Star no Star
You end up right here my friend
Star no Star
We end up dead in the end
Star no Star
We end up right here my friend
Star no Star

We end up right here my friend
Star no Star
We end up right here my friend
Star no Star
We end up right here my friend
Star no Star

Protecting Women ?

Here’s my comment on a female erotica writer’s blog. The blogger’s post in question is  called ” Unpacking The Baggage of History: Sex Work and the Myth of Protecting Women”

Me:

But isn’t the idea of a “happy hooker” not a myth as well? Prostitutes who don’t want to exit are in the minority.Also, *my* kind of feminism does not feel any sort of paternalism over prostitued people, and other kinds fully support legalization. I, however, do not. I’ve heard too many tesitmonies (straight from sex worker’s mouths) and read too many studies about how dangerous an industry it can be.But I didn’t come here to cause anything. Just my opinion.

Here is some of her post:

The phrase ‘sex trafficking’ is being used to encompass all sex work – including sex work by consenting adults with agency. It masks a very disturbing form of ‘gaslighting’ which argues that no ‘sane’ woman would agree to sex work. So all adult women who consentingly perform sex work are too brainwashed and victimized to know what they are consenting to. They have been, in fact, culturally relegated to the position of women who require the state to make decisions on their behalf because they can’t possible be freely making this decision on their own. This is as offensive and repressive as the laws and attitudes of the past in which women were thought intellectually incapable of voting or having say over their own reproductive functions.

Firstly, radfems know that feminists as a whole do not agree when it comes to sex work. Liberal feminists support sex work and find it empowering. This erotica writer, pseudonym initials RG, has lumped all feminists together when really I think she’s pointing at us. Radical feminists.

In my opinion, my comment is pretty watered down compared to the book one could write about this (and has already been written multiple times).

Now, I will mention that RG’e erotica is portrays rape, beastiality, torture, and bdsm aspects. Her approach is that she does not reach for arousal in readers, but contemplative thought. Many of her female characters crave piv and experience immemse pleasure from it (sometimes addictive), of which made it difficult for me to relate with them. I’ve read some of her books. Her writing is superb, but the subjects questionable.

But anyways, I would never want to insult any woman and say that she isn’t ‘sane’ for working in the sex industry. A lot of sex workers know. They know, okay? Ignoring their voices seems to be what sex-pozzies love to do.

The happy members of an oppressed population doesn’t make that population any less oppressed.

What others don’t understand is that radfems come from all walks of like, some having actually been a part of the sex industry. And the last thing I would do is ignore what they have to say.

Oh and, yes, I will admit. I would like to protect a fellow female if I could. What’s so wrong with that?

EDIT

Her reply to me earlier comment:

The myth of a happy hooker is about as much a myth as the happy factory worker or the happy floor cleaner. Would these people rather have better paying, more respected jobs? Yup.
Sex workers who don’t want to be sex workers should stop being sex workers. Period. And legalizing the industry will make it more likely that someone who feels coerced to do the job has some legal remedy. As an illegal industry, sex workers have no legal remedy at all.How does keeping an industry illegal make it safer? Certainly making it illegal doesn’t stop it. Sex work has been going on since the dawn of time, and it has usually been taboo or illegal within a society. How does maintaining that status quo make it safer?

She assumes that leaving the sex industry is easy.

Um, what?

No.

When you say that the want for an end to sex work hurts the choices of all those consenually involved, you are ignoring every woman’s (and sometimes man’s) testimonies of how harmful said ‘work’ is. Sex ‘work’ ruins people (read: women are people too), no matter how much you like to focus on the positives.

-_-    Just no.

PS: Does the idea of purchasing someone’s body parts for personal (and risky/dangerous) use not around totally disturbing? Seriously. Those consenual, happy, empowered, speshuuul people don’t make up for all that’s wrong with the mass sexual exploitation going on worldwide.

Like seriously. No.

Againstpornography.org: Women’s Testimonies

My heart breaks and my stomach churns. 

Women’s Testimonies 

“I am speaking for a group of women. We all live in Minneapolis and we all are former prostitutes. All of us feel very strongly about the relationship between pornography and prostitution. Many of us wanted to testify at this hearing but are unable because of the consequences of being identified as a former whore. This is absolutely incredible to me that prostitution is seen as a victimless activity… We have started to meet together to make sense of the abuse we have experienced in prostitution and how pornography endorses and legitimizes that abuse. These are some of our stories. The following has all happened to real women who are the exception because they have survived both pornography and prostitution… One of the very first commonalities we discovered as a group: we were all introduced to prostitution through pornography. There were no exceptions in our group, and we were all under eighteen… Pornography was our textbook. We learned the tricks of the trade by men exposing us to pornography and us trying to mimic what we saw… Before I go on — one might make the assumption that if a woman got involved with pornography and prostitution after she was eighteen, that she is a willing participant. And since the women I speak for were all underage when they began, it is easier to see them as victims. Personally, I feel this to be very dangerous. By talking to women who got involved with prostitution and pornography in their early twenties, the powerlessness and victimization they described and experienced is the same that younger women and children feel… One of us had the experience of being paid by a client to go to a house located in the 6th Ward. When she got there, she found a group of physically disabled men and a group of physically abled men. Everyone was watching pornographic films — movies of men fucking women, women doing oral sex on men, and women being penetrated by animals. The movies were played continuously… [T]he able-bodied men said they were going to show the handicapped men how “real men” do it. They forced the woman to enact simultaneously with the movie… Another story is, a woman met a man in a hotel room in the 5th Ward. When she got there she was tied up while sitting on a chair nude. She was gagged and left alone in the dark for what she believed to be an hour. The man returned with two other men. They burned her with cigarettes and attached nipple clips to her breasts. They had many S and M magazines with them and showed her many pictures of women appearing to consent, enjoy, and encourage this abuse. She was held for twelve hours, continously raped and beaten… Men would constantly want to do what they have seen in pornography. If pornography was not actually in the room with the client, there would be constant reference. One example is that a woman was in a room with two clients, one man told the other that he had seen some pictures of women who had shaved their pubic hair and that it had turned him on. They then proceeded with a jackknife to remove the woman’s pubic hairs, plucking and burning what the knife had missed. They made comments of how her hairless vagina reminded them of their young daughters’ genitals. They then, of course, engaged in intercourse… Women were forced constantly to enact specific scenes that men had witnessed in pornography. They would direct women to copy postures and poses of things they had seen in magazines and then they would take their own pictures of the women… It is very amazing to me what happens when a group of ex-prostitutes get together in one room and tell stories. One of the things we discovered was that the men we had serviced were very powerful men in this community. Especially interesting to us are the amounts of men involved in the media in this community that use prostitutes and pornography. These are the same men that perpetuate the myth that Minneapolis is a clean city with exceptional morals and a high quality of life… My wish is that you could see with my eyes just for a day how clear the relationship is between pornography and the systematic abuse of women… I would also like to say that I’m petrified and scared for young women today. I believe the pornography that is published today is more brutal and dangerous than when I was involved. And because I understand clearly the direct relationship between the material and the abuse of women, I am very terrified of the consequences of what that means… I also have a couple written testimonies of women who were not able to speak tonight for the reasons I already gave. [Reading first written testimony]: “I remember a house on Second Avenue South, near 22nd Street which I was asked to go to by a trick… It turned out to be the same house that my pimp had been urging me to go to where he told me young pretty girls could go and get tied up, beaten and burned with cigarettes, and earn $500 for a short half hour’s work. I had steadily refused to go, but when my pimp found out that I had been invited, so to speak, I had to go there… The woman who ran the place actually lived there with her children. She kept a room upstairs for the tricks to use. It had a projector to show porn films and there was stacks of pornographic material in the room. The tricks would go in there, look at the porn to get psyched up and then the girl would be sent into the room. The youngest girl I know about who went there was only 13… When I went into that room, the trick said that I was almost too old, but he was pleased with me because I looked young. He stripped me, tied me up, spread-eagled, on the bed so that I could not move and then began to caress me very gently. Then, when he thought that I was relaxed, he squeezed my nipple really hard. I did not react. He held up a porn magazine with a picture of a beaten woman and said, “I want you to look like that. I want you to hurt.” He then began beating me, and when I didn’t cry fast enough, he lit a cigarette and held it right above my breast for a long time before he burned me. I told him that as God was my witness, he had better kill me or untie me right now, because if he didn’t, I would turn him in to the police and that I would call his wife and tell his family about him. He believed me and let me go. But I know that this house continued to provide that service for those who could pay…” [Reading second written testimony]: “I was the main woman of a pimp who filmed sexual acts almost every night in our home. The dope man, who supplied us with cocaine for free in exchange for these arranged orgies, was a really freaky man who would do anything. They arranged to have women, who I assumed were forced to be there, have sex with dogs and filmed those acts. There were stacks of films all over the house, which my pimp used to blackmail people with… One morning I came downstairs in time to see a very young girl run naked out of the house. I found her friend, also naked, tied up in the closet. The one who ran away, after being forced to perform sexually all night, went to the police. I don’t know what my pimp did with the other girl. I do know that he kidnapped them and felt safe, because they were foreign and alone. The girl came back with the police, but nothing ever happened. My pimp continued to make films of people doing every kind of sex act in the living room of our home…” 

We (women) are not making this up. You can’t make this stuff up. 

 

Proof: So you know it’s true

Check this out.

Women telling the truth.

The truth you ask?

Penis in vagina sex is basically unecssary to female pleasure (sex with women in general). Some quotes below:

YES. I make all the noises and do all the moving, but…honestly, it kind of hurts at first. And then it feels okay and then nothing else happens on my end. So then I am frustrated and I debate trying to find my vibrator while my boyfriend is in the bathroom but I spend so long debating that he comes out and I have to pretend to just be idly lolling around in a haze of post-coital bliss rather than figuring out how to ask if he’s sure he’s doing sex right.So yeah, glad I am not the only one
🙂

I like sex plenty, but I’m in the same boat. Need something other than p in v. And I loved this quote: “Men don’t have to have a fucking spiritual awakening to get off, so why should I have to meditate my way into an orgasm?” [As in, fuck psychological fweelings a woman may get during vaginal intercourse. See trauma-bonding]. SERIOUSLY. Why can’t I just bang my husband and orgasm without having to do twenty other things or get in a mystical mindset? I just want to freaking cum. Evolution is a bitch for making it so difficult.

I think a lot of the angry responses are from dudes who don’t want to be told that the only thing they have to offer to the world doesn’t actually do much. [Written by a male]

I think it goes deeper than that. I think it would stress anyone out to think that they are sexually inadequate in such a basic way that is so beyond their control. Like, no matter what you do, something that brings you great pleasure and intimacy is just kind of a nothing burger for the other person at best. AT BEST. Once the idea has been introduced into your mind you start to question whether your partner just does it to humor you and get it done with or if they actually enjoy it and if they don’t enjoy it why put them through this (I had this kind of existential sexual dilemma when I was 19 with my first serious GF who just didnt want to have sex after the first few months and it was shockingly an STD related issue)some of the responses are angry ego centric driven responses, But I can see this really bumming out otherwise loving and caring guys that this specific sex act just is just kind of a one sided and selfish like a BJ. [Written by a male]

I like the idea of PIV sex rather than the actual act itself. Every time I end up having it my mind wanders around like ‘what am I having for dinner?’ or something like that and my vagina always ends up super disappointed (‘oh? you’re finished…oh yeah i totally came yep totally, good job’).

Bold mine. Bold and italics are my comments.

Now there were a lot of comments of women declaring how much they love how piv feels, whether they orgasm from it or not. Of course, piv as a mandatory sexual act goes far beyond pleasure. The risks are far too high to even get pleasure from it. It has been a method amongst many to keep females inferior and as the ones who get ‘fucked’. And it has served to prove the masochistic and subordinate tendencies in females, because men know that if a woman actually wants to be fucked by a man, in this way, then obviously she is naturally a masochist.

Piv should not be on the menu unless conception is the actual goal. Which makes sense, right? One would think it would. And even for conception, a penis doesn’t have to enter the vagina, just sperm.

Again, the intimacy females feel during piv is trauma-bonding, as other radfems have already said before. Piv can get us pregnant, cause disease/std (easiesy way to catch one btw), and has been systematically used to oppress us via rape, prostitution, marriage (and now pornography). Females are groomed to see any male attention as some sort of gift, no matter how cold or disant or violent that attention is at times. If a man wants to ‘join his body with yours’ then he must luv you and care about you. You’re being intimate and bonding and making love. And if it’s just ‘casual’ piv, then she will still be deemed a whore even though males demand such sexual acts.

Is it possible that males are only supposed to have sex with females when reproduction is the sole purpose? Their bodies/genitalia only serve the purpose of ejaculating regardless of how muscely they are or how well they can hunt or fix a car or something. Funny how much lesbian and gay sex makes sense. A woman can be stimulated in every way she needs to feel recreational pleasure with another woman, as can a man with another man. Am I saying that everyone should be homosexual? No, not really.

But look at other primate species (humans are very similar to them by the way). The males and females mate typically once a year and then the males go off on their own and the females and children do their own thing alone. With the way that human females are only fertile for a little bit of time out of each month, it makes sense that piv is not supposed to be practiced at the rate it is in this patriarchal world. If it wasn’t, abortion would not be needed, nor would the pill, the iud, diaphragm,etc. Of course, females need these because of how much men and boys rape us, and still probably would as long as males are like this. And who knows if males are wired to do such violence within their biological makeup? They could very well be. That y-chromosome is a tricky one, but oh so predictable.

Anyways, the point of all this is to just give my own little analysis of piv. Running across that article above got me thinking.

Comments are much appreciated. (If you can be decent and not-rude about it.)

On the State of Western-world Women and Feminism

This essay was written for my English class. If you read a couple of some older posts, I talked about an inquiry project. It did not come out completely as I had planned, and it is (in terms of radfem perspective) watered down, but I enjoyed writing it and even got an A! So, enjoy. It reads like a research paper written for school. Comments from my teacher are at the bottom. Also, I do plan ongoing even deeper into the topics I covered. Eventually. 

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

On the State of Western-world Women and Feminism

 

In the late 18th century, the feminist movement, also known as the women’s rights movement,   began. The first gathering for women in the movement was in 1848 at the Seneca Falls Convention (history.house.gov). From there was the start of the first large goal of feminism, during which women such as Alice Paul and Lucy Burns worked with the Suffragettes and gained a woman’s right to vote after seventy years of avid protest (history.house.gov). This was a part of the first wave of feminism, lasting until the 1920’s. Since that time, there have been a second and third wave of feminism, with the third wave still going on today (history.house.gov). The women of the cause have accomplished much, however, most feminists agree that the fight is far from over. We have had success, but have females gained enough?

Female is woman’s biological identity. Woman is the category females are placed in within society. Both the terms ‘female’ and ‘woman’ hold negative connotations that have been present for centuries. These connotations are burdens upon female shoulders and serve as justifications for our oppression. Some may disagree, believing that the female population has overcome their oppression, their unequal rights, and gained full autonomy over themselves, but what no one can deny is that our history, our female history, has been tainted with being seen as less than human, as second-class citizens, and as inferior to male-bodied persons. Therefore, my question is this: After all achieved by the feminist movement in the last two centuries, are Western-world women of the 21st century truly liberated? Did feminism work? And is their work done? 

To begin answering this question, it is best to start on the surface prior to diving in deeper. When observing what women do and what they may or may not deal with on a daily basis, oftentimes one can see parallels with the ways in which females lived many years ago to how they do in the present day. More specifically, the ideals that a woman must always keep up her appearance and be aesthetically pleasing continues to be upheld in Western society. Shelia Jeffereys, prominent feminist from the 1960’s to the present, says that “Some `new’ feminists argue that beauty practices are no longer oppressive now that women can ‘choose’ them.”  There is a lack of agreement between the ideas of old and young feminists on beauty mandates and the choices women have today. In her book, Beauty and Misogyny: Harmful Cultural Practices in the West, Jeffreys argues that beauty practices may be a part of women’s subordination rather than their agency (Jeffreys 14).  Whether in the media or in one’s own life, women and girls of all ages can be seen wearing makeup, seemingly or obviously painful shoe wear, and much tighter clothing than those worn by men. It is more so ingrained into our daily routine than an active choice we make after thought. Using myself as an example, I cannot go out in public without wearing earrings or else I will feel like I am not dressed at all. My ears were pierced while I was still in infancy, and having pierced ears has been all I have ever known. It was seen as a requirement to my mother that her daughter—but not her son—have pierced ears and where earrings every day because that is what she herself had learned in childhood/girlhood.

If someone is groomed from an early age to engage in daily practices that have been done for centuries as a part of tradition and sex roles, then how much choice goes into doing those practices? How much of what women do is a matter of what has been socially acceptable for decades upon decades? As liberal feminists claim, any female can choose to go through beauty practices and is empowered to do so. But in most of the Western-world, if a woman is to forgo traditionally female beauty mandates assigned to the gender of women, then she can possibly face discrimination and be deemed odd or an outcast. In recent times, radical and liberal feminists have argued over how much choice women have even today.

Shelia Jeffreys said that “Feminists who continued to argue that women’s choices were severely constrained and made within a context of women’s relative powerlessness and male dominance were criticized…” (Jeffreys 15). Feminists who agree with her analysis would say that women live under the male gaze.  Worldwide, women are subconsciously seen as the “sex class”, as many feminists declare, while men are the consumers (Jeffreys 50).  This phenomenon can be seen anywhere; in television, movies, adult entertainment, music, fashion, magazines, or going so far as one’s local Hooter’s restaurant. Within first-world societies, where sexuality has become a major aspect of media and entertainment, women have taken on the role as the half who “puts-out” and sell their bodies far more than men do. From this, one could say that females can choose all they want in modern times, but our choices are not of a broad range. Women are expected to be sexually available at all times, living in a culture in which women still exist to serve men sexually and domestically (Hajdin). Often bombarded with negative, insecurity-causing ideologies and images, “we appease because we fear being shut out, excluded, and called ugly, or losing validation through male attention and approval” (Hajdin).

Most routine practices females are expected and sometimes forced to engage in are physically harmful, timewasting, and detrimental to self-esteem. Woman is supposedly inferior by default and the actions done to us and the actions we must do reflect that sentiment. Andrea Dworkin states in her novel Woman Hating, with regards to female beauty practices and standards, that “They prescribe her mobility, spontaneity, posture, gait, (and) the uses to which she can put her body. They define precisely the dimensions of her physical freedom.”(Jeffreys 20). Some women, participating in discussions on Tumblr, have claimed that the only time men have been attracted to them was when they were at their most “vulnerable”, and least attracted to them when they were feeling the most confident, independent, and sure of self.

A mentionable example of male pleasure through female vulnerability is the custom of female foot binding in China. The tradition was believed to have begun circa 970 AD (Collet). For thousands of years, three-inch long, bound feet were considered highly erotic (Collet), and goes on at a much smaller rate in modern-day Asia. Quite similarly, American and European women in past centuries endured high heels, rib-breaking corsets, and lead makeup (Jeffreys). The fact that females face constant harm is still perpetuated in the 21st century.

Female subordination and use as mere products of beauty and sexuality has been blown to massive proportions, much to feminists’ disdain. Technology has made pornography and all other work within the sex trade easily available and more accepted within society. Males now claim that it is a basis of instinct, need, and biology that they have the right to consume adult entertainment, make use of prostituted or possibly trafficked women, and enjoy strip clubs. Many, but not all, feminists advocate to end female and human exploitation of any kind. These ‘careers’ are often believed to be truly acquired by the choice of women in the sex trade (or men) and that they are so harmful that consumers should be penalized. However, glamorous is not often a way to describe life as an adult film actor or a prostitute. Their work is directly dangerous and upholds the view of women as sexual commodities in society, a view that has yet to be fully eradicated.

With regards to the millions of women in the sex trade, prostitution as an institution has been around the longest. People, usually of  the liberal political group, are beginning to advocate for the legalization of prostitution all over the United States, but what they see as allowing females to choose whatever line of work they desire cannot help all of the of women working in this circuit become free from its exploitive, fatal, harmful reality. Julie Bindel, feminist activist from The Guardian, was told by Roger Matthews, professor of criminology at London’s South Bank University, that prostitution “is abuse and a life of hell” for her similarly titled article. He recalled instances in which most of these women were beaten, raped, sexually assaulted, asked to perform crude acts, and murdered by customers and pimps (Bindel). These women were often only in the trade as a means of supporting their children or harboring a drug and/or alcohol addiction (Bindel). Matthews firmly believes that “You can’t remove the abuse and coercion from prostitution, whether legal or not,” and that “the punters should be deterred from buying sex, women in prostitution should be decriminalized, and a radical welfare strategy should be put in place to help them out of the trade”(Bindel).

One question for reasoning for supporting the upkeep of prostitution globally, and especially in first-world countries, is one on which we ask “What was the cause of women going into sex work many centuries ago?” Did the women thousands of years ago happily enter such a ‘career’, and do they now? Most would never actively or enthusiastically choose to be used and exploited by means of other people’s pleasure, majority of those other people being married men (Gannon).  The fact that it is predominantly women in the lines of sex work and sexualized media—and have been in those roles for thousands of years—proves that females are seen as the sex class, not a sexually liberated, free, autonomous population.

Prostitution, as well as pornography—an equally harmful industry for females—perpetuates views that females are meant for either motherhood/being a wife or sexual usage just as beauty mandates and the media do.

Another large scale issue in the Western-world, and worldwide, is the common trend that is male-on-female violence, typically of sexual or sex-based motivations. Of course, crime happens everywhere and could happen to anyone, but it is not simple coincidence that violence against females gets ignored and victims are directly or indirectly blamed for said violence. For a problem much closer to home, universities are coming under ridicule for lack of response to rape and sexual assault on campus. An article, written by Callie Beusman, explores the lack of response to cases of rape and sexual assault on university campuses. One would think, in these modern times, that such violence would no longer be looked over, especially on a campus where students feel safe. Beusman summarizes the issue seven women, some college students, have chosen to find a solution to by saying that universities are having inadequate and unhelpful responses to female students facing violence at the hands of fellow students, all male. Of these seven women, a few recall their experiences with rape and the lack of support by campus authorities before a council in which the women have filed a Title IX complaint of the University of Connecticut (Beusman).

Even discrimination against females because of their sex persists. Women working 41 to 44 hours per week earn 84.6% of what men working similar hours earn; women working more than 60 hours per week earn only 78.3% of what men in the same time category earn (City Vision College). Women have to work for a longer period of time to receive the promotions that provide access to higher pay (City Vision College). And for one last fact, women typically face challenges breaking into male-dominated fields (City Vision College).

It seems plausible that male view, and internalized female view, of women in society has consistently, across time and space, been one in which females are inferior, irrational, emotional, and only useful for sex. This sentiment appears to apply to females of all ages and demographics. The stigma that women who report violence and sexism against them ‘are making it up’ still silences those who did face such tragedies.

Women were silenced in the past and we are silenced in the present as well. Our rights to vote, own property, divorce, and choose abortion or not choose it (of which is being threatened), have marital rape be considered illegal, enter the work force, choose how we dress, etc. have allowed freedoms of women in the countries that provide such rights no other generation of females have ever known. But the work is far from over, as proven above.

However, are groups of men and women who believe that feminism has become unnecessary and harmful. Men’s rights activists, or MRAs, actively believe that feminism is harmful to society and directly hurts men (A Voice for Men). Rather than seeing feminism as a resistance, they see feminism as a direct attack on the male species. They have voiced such opinions saying, “The concept of rape has a lot of utility for women. One, it feeds their narcissistic need to feel irresistible” (Elam), putting blame on female rape victims as if sexual violence benefits women. Paul Elam, founder of the website A Voice for Men, claimed that it was natural for men to be rough, dominant, and speak of crude things because
“Most all of them [women], want to be sexually dominated”. Also, MRA’s have denounced feminism by saying that “Feminism has [led] to the oppression of men” (A Voice for Men). However, feminism is a defense system against the patriarchal, male-run world we live in and have lived in for thousands of years, never has it been a movement towards male oppression. Female liberation and speaking the truth has been the main goal this entire time, not to do unto others what they have done to us.

Some have accepted institutions and practices that have harmed females in the past as a possible choice for us now, but perhaps it is to denounce them for now, until a female can do whatever she pleases without facing objectification, being sexualized, discrimination, misogyny, and/or ridicule. According to the feminists group I personally agree with, selling our bodies should never be an actual option, nor should striving for warped ideals of ‘perfection’, or feeling less because we are female-bodied persons. An option or choice should not be one met with ambivalence, without thought, or one out of desperation and/or a lack of other choices. This is the reality of women and girls, even if they are of privileged societies, and that reality is not as sweet as it could or should be. It has become so desensitized within and around us, that many do not see it surrounding us every day.

Feminism, females joining together for a cause, is the solution, and that solution has yet come full circle. 

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Teacher’s comments (thanks Mrs. R!):

  • “More specifically, the ideals that a woman must always keep up her appearance and be aesthetically pleasing continues to be upheld in Western society.”

I’m interested in hearing more of your thoughts on this—I know what you’re trying to say here, but you haven’t yet established that historically women’s appearance has been a contested issue.  There are a lot of historical examples that prove this, but you’re skipping over that part.  Just something to think about.

  • “Using myself as an example, I cannot go out in public without wearing earrings or else I will feel like I am not dressed at all. My ears were pierced while I was still in infancy, and having pierced ears has been all I have ever known. It was seen as a requirement to my mother that her daughter—but not her son—have pierced ears and where earrings every day because that is what she herself had learned in childhood/girlhood.”

Good discussion here!

  • “A mentionable example of male pleasure through female vulnerability is the custom of female foot binding in China. The tradition was believed to have begun circa 970 AD (Collet). For thousands of years, three-inch long, bound feet were considered highly erotic (Collet), and goes on at a much smaller rate in modern-day Asia. Quite similarly, American and European women in past centuries endured high heels, rib-breaking corsets, and lead makeup (Jeffreys). The fact that females face constant harm is still perpetuated in the 21st century.”

     

True…but to what extent?  These cultural practices are no longer happening, but I suppose you could say that other practices (ex. platform heeled shoes) have been substituted for these.  What do you think?

 

I’ll even share my grade! Cause hey! It’s anonymous!

Making a clear argument (30 points): 26

Structure and organization (20 points): 18

Voice (10 points): 10

Readability (10 points): 10

Originality (10 points): 10

Citing (in-text and works cited) (20 points): 16

Total:  90 /100

 

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Please share thoughts below!

Grand Theft Auto

Grabd Theft Auto V, released this year, has tons of misgynist aspects.

My brother and I like to play video games. It’s kind of a bonding thing for us. But if a game portrays the degredation and harm of women  (aside of from all the homicide in general) I voice my opinion until my younger sibling’s ears fall off. And gladly.

In GTA, a player can go to a strip club in which a stripper repeatedly says that “stipping sucks” and that she “only does it for the money” whilst giving the in-game character a lap dance. Her name is Chastity, which is supposed to a be a cute irony.

If the stripper likes you enough (as in if you can make it rain enough) she will provide the use of her body back at her place. Not surprising, but I found this to be terribly disturbing. Also a total male fantasy. Most strippers wouldn’t even want the pervy males to lay a hand on them in real life.

And even worse, or just as bad, the player can pick up a prostitute on the side of the road and take her to a secluded spot so she will either provide oral sex or the use of her internal reproductive organ (her vagina). And the happy, saccharine voices these female voice actors use is sickening. Because in real life, sex ‘workers’ must be just as good an actor, and grin and bear it or face often fatal consequences.

I’ve been reading a lot of prostitution critique for my inquiry paper on feminism. And it’s depressing as well as refreshingly truthful.

Sometimes it’s too much to take in. I hate, hate , hate what females must go through and have gone through for so long. It breaks my heart and inspires me to go on with every written word.

I’m currently surfing whatispatriarchy.tumblr.com

Some mostly great stuff. Check it out.